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Psychological domestic complexities and their proven authentic remedies

Ubqari Magazine - February 2016

The letters of distorted families and their peaceful answers

Do send the replying envelop and write the complete address and do not haste about the answer of letter.

Its difficult to stay jobless

I worked hard my whole life, I arranged my school and college fee by myself I did not want to marry but I had married because of the desire of my mother. But I did not leave the job. I have a child now and my husband want me to leave to take care of the child. I think that it will be difficult for me to stay without job and then I will have to take money from my husband for my needs. I am confused. (Shakila, Islamabad)

Answer: if your husband wants you to leave the job for the kid then he will take care of your expenditure also. Your and kid's responsibility is upon him, this childhood of the child will not come again, when he needs you the most and you can also enjoy his each and every little thing. Usually working ladies miss to enjoy those movements which a non working lady enjoys. When the child is grown even then you can do job.

Mentally unfit sister

From the time I start to know the world I saw her in the same way. He is stubborn like children, cries like child, and goes out of the home. when our parents were alive her condition was not so bad, everybody says that she will be in the same state if she wants to go out let her go nobody can stop her. But I know that she will hit others by stones. i think that we were careless she may become fine. (Ahsan Ali, Multan)

Answer: as you told the condition it seems that your sister is mentally weak, and leave these types of patients on their own wills is a cruelty, such patients do not become normal fully but there is a scope of betterment. She needs to kept t home and as the service to humanity sisters or sisters in law must take care of her. And then if she goes toward violence then consult the doctors.

She is a strange girl: one month ago my elder daughter eat sleeping pills and she wrote these words in the letter" I have no complaint to anyone, but i do not want to live any more, despite we fulfill her every need and there is no any issue of boy as well, she was very quiet from last many days I thought that she will be worried about the exams but I was wrong she did not take the exam. she had been going in uniform from home, it was such a big falsity to a mother and taking the pills after that I cannot understand, when i saw my pills empty bottle on her bed I tried to wake her up and took her to doctor and I hide this from my sons but they got the news after reaching the hospital she is a strange girl she has put me in a constant difficulty. (Farhana Bibi, Gujrat)

Answer: when there is no reason of pessimism and someone remains pessimist, someone have no complaint against anybody bit he do not want to live, if he is a student and do not take the exam and if he is a working man and laves the job and he do not have the sense of his responsibilities, and he do not like anything even the life then one should not waste time in understanding that such person is not mentally well. The psychological problems do effect sometimes the reasons are visible and sometimes reasons are invisible. Your daughter seems under desperation, and it is good that the modern treatment ends this disease.

The difficulty after marriage

I am found of going out, and I stay home very less I have a girl friend and now she is forcing me to marry when I discussed this matter in family I got the negative answer. They think that I am irresponsible I will be worried after marriage. I was in anger firstly but then I think what to do, and how the family will come to know that I will be very responsible after marriage. The problem is that Girl wants me to bring your parents but I thought to have the Wedlock done after inviting the friends.                                                              (G, Sh)

Answer: your brain is working very fast in the matter of your desires. The girl seems more intelligent than you. To prove yourself responsible reduce your outings and watch the domestic affairs. Be serious, marriage is not as easy to make successful as to tie the wed lock, one have to change his self to a great extent. To fulfill one desire you will have to sacrifice your freedom and many other desires.

Strange thoughts:

I am a student of the fourth year of MBBS, and final exams are in coming few days, strange thoughts are coming and I have no interest in reading books, I want to cry and I always keep lying on bed. My mother had done dam on me through someone. The thought comes that I cannot pass the medical exams that are why I cannot take interest in studies. The thought comes that the respect in family come will be reduced. I want to go out alone anywhere. ( Durdana Umar Lahore)

 Answer:

You must have read to reach in the final year of MBBS. You passed it up till now and you will pass again through hard work and struggle. Look at your previous success and say to yourself that I will pass this time also. Take help from your friends in those subjects which cannot study with interest. Study in group and teach each other. By telling and teaching others one can understand many things easily. Because it is possible that the thing you cannot understand someone has understood that well, and in the same way the things which are difficult for other girls, you make them understand. And look at the completion of good aim. Reverence will itself increase. The desire to go alone somewhere is due to dejection. After conquering the dejection this feeling will come to an end.

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